Songs and Memories

IF I DIDN'T HAVE YOU

I don't know what I was thinking, 'till I was thinking of you
I don't remember a thing
Before I opened my eyes
and you came into view
I don't know what I was doing
when there was nothing to do
Must've been waiting for someone, baby
Now I can see
I was waiting for you

I'd give up my sight just to see you
I'd beg, and would borrow and steal
I'd cut off my hands just to touch you
And tear out my heart
To let you know how I feel
There's nowhere where I wouldn't follow
There's nothing that I wouldn't do
'Cause I wouldn't wanna be me
If I didn't have you

Driving myself to distraction
Until you got in my way
I was just whistling Dixie
'Til you struck up the band
And they started to play
I don't know how I was living
Until you came in my life
I always knew there was something wrong
Then you came along, baby
And you made it right

I was alone in the silence
'Til I was hearing your voice
I couldn't see my way clear
Until you parted the clouds
And you gave me a choice
I couldn't pick up the pieces
'Til I was falling apart
I didn't know I was bleeding
'Til your love fixed the hole, baby
Here in my heart

I'd give up my sight, just to see you
I'd beg, and would borrow and steal
I'd cut off my hands
Just to touch you
And tear out my heart
So you'd know how I feel
There's nowhere that I wouldn't follow
There's no place where I'd rather be
This life without you would be hollow
This love is a gift
And you gave it to me
All that I am
You have made me
And baby, I know that it's true
That I wouldn't want to be me
If I didn't have you.

The Devil's In The Details

As most of you know, I am finishing my book "Dancing With the Devil ". It is a book of stories about the Streator Fire Dept. I am now working on the Williams Hardware Explosion and fire which occurred on July 14, 1958. It took the lives of 6 people and destroyed what was one of the largest hardware stores in Northern Illinois. It took 12 fire departments over 12 hours to put it out. I have read everything I could get my hands on to prepare this chapter. I know the story by heart,so it should be easy to write..but it isn't. Most of the reports which went out over the newswires nationwide varied wildly in the details...Rumors were flying(as they often do in a small town) I have read accounts from newspapers all over the United States about what was happening on South Vermillion St on that muggy July day. Most of it I simply dismissed because it was so off what I knew had happened. With my education in history I learned that there are many sides to a story : our Professors favorite example was The is a collision between 2 cars at a busy intersection..how many sides to that story ? Well there's the 2 drivers, the people following them, the people standing on all 4 corners waiting to cross the street, the people walking down the sidewalk..etc..each individual tells the story differently..the way THEY saw it happen..and the all vary widely in the details. That is the way that it has been for me with this story. The details vary wildly to the point where I think they just made some of it up to make the story more dramatic...there were 30-40 people trapped (false) they had found more bodies than was reported (rumor..false), there were two people trapped on the 2nd floor (false) and on and on... Streator fireman Lawerence McGurk  was interviewed for the Ottawa Republican Times. He was injured after being blown off a ladder while trying to rescue a man who was trapped on the second floor..This was after he and a volunteer (Earl Pollett) had made there way into the burning building to rescue a woman trapped on the first floor..He tried three times to get to the man on his fourth attempt, an explosion occurred in the basement and McGurk and the ladder he was on were enveloped in a fireball and he was blown approx 15 feet out into the middle of a debris filled Vermillion St. This ended any more rescue attempts. The front of the building was so hot that a hose had been played on McGurk to keep his clothing from catching fire on his last trip up the ladder. McGurk had almost reached the window when the explosion occurred. The man, later identified as George Blaine, store clerk , had appeared at the window screaming for help, hair and clothing ablaze. He was later found just inside the window.
McGurk said he was jut about to reach for the window, when the next thing he knew, he was being dragged onto the sidewalk across the street. He sustained burns and a sprained ankle in the fall. He figured he had slid back down the ladder because he wasnt seriously hurt. He was suprised when he heard that he had been blown off the ladder..this entire story was in the Ottawa paper..non of it was in the Streator paper...His heroics are the center of my chapter, he deserves the recognition....I just hope that I tell these stories in an interesting way that people will enjoy reading and learning a little about the history iof the Streator Fire Dept and Streator itself.

The Dance

Looking back on the memory of the dance we shared 'neath the stars above
For a moment , all the world was right
How could I have known, that you'd ever say goodbye.

And now, I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end
The way it all would go
Our lives were better to chance
I could've missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Holding you, I held everything
For a moment, wasn't I the king
But if I'd only known
How the king would fall
Hey who's to say, you know I might have changed it all

And now, I'm glad I didn't know
the way it all would end
the way it all would go
Our lives were better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I 'd have had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance
I could've missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance


This is one of my very favorite Garth Brooks songs..it brings back memories of a very special person, with whom I shared a slow dance with a long time ago in The Villa (of all places). She and I were pals and had spent some time at T-n-Teke's..(yes it was still the old place then) and we walked over to the Villa to hear some music and ended up slow dancing to Freebird (of all things) It was the longest and best slow dance of my entire life...... It is one of my favorite memories and I will never forget it...to this day that song means one thing to me..a very long and wonderful dance.....